Welcome to our collection of Medicine Personal Statement Examples! We’ve searched far and wide to find personal statements from successful applicants all around the UK and asked them to analyse the strengths and weaknesses of their work for your own inspiration. Today’s subject is from Lucy, who studies Medicine at the University of Cambridge.
Lucy applied to study medicine in 2020 at some of the top Universities in the UK, including Imperial and Birmingham, and subsequently received offers from three of her four choices, of which she chose Cambridge.
| University | University of Cambridge | Imperial College London | Cardiff University | University of Birmingham |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Offer? | Yes | Yes | Yes |
Let’s read the personal statement that got her a place at the University of Cambridge, or skip straight to her feedback to learn what made her personal statement a success!
Please be aware that these examples are meant purely for the sake of inspiration, and should absolutely NOT be used as a model around which to base your own personal statement. UCAS have a rather strict system that detects plagiarism.
Cambridge Medicine Personal Statement Example
WHOLE PERSONAL STATEMENT
My interest in medicine stems originally from my fascination with science and its relation to the human body, and the opportunity to apply medical research to improve people’s lives. However, it was volunteering in a nursing home for a year and realising how much joy just offering care and empathy can give that motivated me to pursue a medical career.
Watching one of the residents with whom I had built a bond gradually showing the unrelenting impacts of ageing highlighted the difficulty in maintaining emotional resilience in medicine. This inspired me to read ‘Being Mortal’ which shed light on the roles of a doctor in end of life care whilst making me increasingly aware of the ethical dilemmas in supporting an ageing population. To enhance my interpersonal skills, I also volunteered at a charity shop where facing difficult customers has made me more confident and versatile in my interactions with the public.
Shadowing a GP emphasised to me the incredible demand put on primary care services but also the efficacy of triage and good organisation. Nurses ran minor illness clinics, freeing up GPs to see more urgent or complex patients which enabled the practice to run smoothly and efficiently. Despite having a backlog of patients to see, the GP’s calm and sensitive manner towards each individual was inspiring. A high level of care I aspire to achieve as a doctor. My hospital work experience reiterated the value of cohesive team-work during an anterior cruciate ligament replacement and I was impressed by how team members’ roles and responsibilities complemented each other. Team-work and leadership are integral to my role as a Prefect and as co-secretary in BAYouth, the Welsh NHS’ youth advisory panel, ensuring that minutes are written and projects completed. Sitting on interview panels has given me an insight into the diversity of roles within healthcare and the importance of each member in a multidisciplinary team.
I thoroughly enjoyed doing my Extended Project on nanomedicine as it showed how the scientific disciplines of physics, biology and chemistry overlap each other in medicine. Synthesising complex scientific literature taught me valuable critical thinking and extended writing skills. Through time-consuming amendments, challenging me to deal with uncertainty and situations not going to plan, I found that effective organisation made the research process much more manageable, allowing me to complete my EPQ to a high standard in one year. The scientific principles that underpin medicine continue to fascinate me, and therefore, I arranged work experience in the Centre for Nanohealth. It was exciting to successfully make and test my own glucose microneedle biosensor and assist in cutting-edge medical research.
As a naturally curious person, I enjoy investigating medical advancements in the New Scientist magazine. Since coming across a patient with fibromyalgia in my work experience, I have also been interested in topics surrounding neuroscience. The prospect of utilising scientific innovation in clinical contexts excites me and I look forward to furthering my understanding of science throughout my career.
As a Grade 8 pianist, I relish in performing in concerts and competitions under pressure. However, music, alongside badminton, mainly helps me to relax. I enjoyed completing my Bronze Duke of Edinburgh award and the UKMT Mathematics challenges which made use of my problem-solving skills, and doing Grade 8 LAMDA examinations enhanced my communication skills. I believe effective time-management enables me to integrate academia with relaxation so that I can maintain a good work-life balance.
My resolve to study medicine is the result of long contemplation. I know that it will often be gruelling and will involve sacrifices, but I believe it will offer a sense of satisfaction like no other job. My intrinsic scientific curiosity along with my desire for social interaction drive a commitment to medicine as a life-long endeavour.
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Cambridge Medicine Personal Statement Example Analysis
Now, let’s go section by section and see what Lucy has to say about what she wrote:
INTRODUCTION
My interest in medicine stems originally from my fascination with science and its relation to the human body, and the opportunity to apply medical research to improve people’s lives. However, it was volunteering in a nursing home for a year and realising how much joy just offering care and empathy can give that motivated me to pursue a medical career.
- THE GOOD
Introduction
The introduction is simple & clear, with no filler or frills. My intention was simply to state why I wanted to go into healthcare rather than a purely scientific career. It’s always good to hone in on what is about medicine in particular that interests you, as it is very easy to discuss topics that could apply to other subjects like Biology, Chemistry, etc. It was also backed by evidence from my time in the care home. It is not too long which is important for maintaining attention, but gets across a lot of points and provides topics for further discussion in the main body of the statement.
- THE BAD
Introduction
It does feel a bit cliched to speak about medicine in such a noble and positive way, but it is how I genuinely felt when writing this statement. This can be seen in some of my choices of words, such as ‘joy’, which could have been a bit more sincere and less idealistic. The admissions team want to see people with an actual desire to enter medicine, but it can perhaps seem naive to describe experience like this in such a way. It also reads as if the nursing home was the only reason for me to pursue medicine rather than an accumulation of experiences, which wasn’t the case.
MAIN BODY
Paragraph 1
Watching one of the residents with whom I had built a bond gradually showing the unrelenting impacts of ageing highlighted the difficulty in maintaining emotional resilience in medicine. This inspired me to read ‘Being Mortal’ which shed light on the roles of a doctor in end of life care whilst making me increasingly aware of the ethical dilemmas in supporting an ageing population. To enhance my interpersonal skills, I also volunteered at a charity shop where facing difficult customers has made me more confident and versatile in my interactions with the public.
- THE GOOD
Paragraph 1
This paragraph follows on from the introduction very directly as it goes into my experience in a nursing home which linked to my reading of ‘Being Mortal’, indicating that I have followed up on my interests and reflections. You should always be looking to demonstrate you understanding of the subject by discussing the connections between different experiences, as well as discussing how they link with medicine as a whole. Not only does it show an understanding of the things you do, but it also tells a story, which makes the statement more interesting to read. I also stated what steps I had done to improve on the skills I saw/read, another key element of writing a personal statement; reflection of one’s experiences.
- THE BAD
Paragraph 1
I was a bit too vague with my discussion of ‘ethical issues‘ but it does give some room for exploration in the interview. However, the biggest flaw with this paragraph is the last sentence. While the connection between difficult customers and difficult patients may seem fairly obvious, this is still the type of thing that I should have actually explored in writing. Even with this in mind though, trying to connect retail experience with medical work was a very big stretch, one that makes me seem even more naive as the two fields are on completely different levels. This was a case of me having experience I wanted to mention without thinking about how it would work in the statement as a whole.
MAIN BODY
Paragraph 2
Shadowing a GP emphasised to me the incredible demand put on primary care services but also the efficacy of triage and good organisation. Nurses ran minor illness clinics, freeing up GPs to see more urgent or complex patients which enabled the practice to run smoothly and efficiently. Despite having a backlog of patients to see, the GP’s calm and sensitive manner towards each individual was inspiring. A high level of care I aspire to achieve as a doctor. My hospital work experience reiterated the value of cohesive team-work during an anterior cruciate ligament replacement and I was impressed by how team members’ roles and responsibilities complemented each other. Team-work and leadership are integral to my role as a Prefect and as co-secretary in BAYouth, the Welsh NHS’ youth advisory panel, ensuring that minutes are written and projects completed. Sitting on interview panels has given me an insight into the diversity of roles within healthcare and the importance of each member in a multidisciplinary team.
- THE GOOD
Paragraph 2
Here, I delve into my most relevant work experience, which is essential for any medical personal statement. Through my description of the things I saw and did, I was able to express the various lessons and values I learnt from my time there. Showing how meaningful the experience was to my development is important for showing my commitment and engagement with the subject. As a more general example, I emphasised the importance of teamwork and showed appreciation for all healthcare workers I had encountered rather than just the doctor, further displaying my appreciation of the work it takes to enter the medical field.
- THE BAD
Paragraph 2
My first major issue isn’t really with the paragraph itself but with the format of the statement as a whole. This should have been my first main body paragraph, as it is a much stronger introduction to my abilities and understanding compared to my experience in care or retail. Those two things are important to mention, but I didn’t start with my best foot forward, which is a definite mistake. In terms of the actual writing here, I didn’t go into detail of specific experiences/things I saw that showed teamwork and was quite vague in ‘complemented each other’- in what way? Instead of describing that I saw a lot of teamwork, I could have cut down the experiences and went into one specific one in more detail.
MAIN BODY
Paragraph 3
I thoroughly enjoyed doing my Extended Project on nanomedicine as it showed how the scientific disciplines of physics, biology and chemistry overlap each other in medicine. Synthesising complex scientific literature taught me valuable critical thinking and extended writing skills. Through time-consuming amendments, challenging me to deal with uncertainty and situations not going to plan, I found that effective organisation made the research process much more manageable, allowing me to complete my EPQ to a high standard in one year. The scientific principles that underpin medicine continue to fascinate me, and therefore, I arranged work experience in the Centre for Nanohealth. It was exciting to successfully make and test my own glucose microneedle biosensor and assist in cutting-edge medical research.
- THE GOOD
Paragraph 3
This paragraph emphasises my scientific interest which is an important skill to demonstrate, especially for Oxbridge applications. Since I sought out work experience in an area related to my EPQ, it shows I am truly interested and dedicated in the topic. While you need to be prepared to branch out into other area throughout your studies, demonstrating that you have already formed an interest in a specialist subject is great for showing that you are proactive and independent.
- THE BAD
Paragraph 3
Instead of just saying I arranged work experience, I should have reflected more on what I gained from it or learnt from it. I could have also described a more specific area of nanomedicine or an interesting case I saw to guide/predict interview questions more easily. The amount of detail I went into was decent, but you can always go deeper into topics, provided you’ve got the word count for it. Either way, it creates a good discussion point at you interview.
MAIN BODY
Paragraph 4/5
As a naturally curious person, I enjoy investigating medical advancements in the New Scientist magazine. Since coming across a patient with fibromyalgia in my work experience, I have also been interested in topics surrounding neuroscience. The prospect of utilising scientific innovation in clinical contexts excites me and I look forward to furthering my understanding of science throughout my career.
As a Grade 8 pianist, I relish in performing in concerts and competitions under pressure. However, music, alongside badminton, mainly helps me to relax. I enjoyed completing my Bronze Duke of Edinburgh award and the UKMT Mathematics challenges which made use of my problem-solving skills, and doing Grade 8 LAMDA examinations enhanced my communication skills. I believe effective time-management enables me to integrate academia with relaxation so that I can maintain a good work-life balance.
- THE GOOD
Paragraph 4/5
These two paragraphs delve deeper into my research and extra-curricular activities, which is always an important thing to discuss in the latter half of your personal statement. The research especially further demonstrates my interest in the subject, while my extra curricular activities help to portray me as a hard-working, well-rounded and multi-skilled individual, something that’s always important for admissions teams.
- THE BAD
Paragraph 4/5
While my research shows further dedication and understanding for the medicine, I have not linked any of my extra-curricular activities to the subject in anyway. I do mention so very general skills that have been developed from these activities, but the best personal statements would link these activities back to medicine in some way, even just with a brief sentence or passing mention. How do my piano or badminton skills make me a better medical student? This is the type of question you should aim to answer.
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CONCLUSION
My resolve to study medicine is the result of long contemplation. I know that it will often be gruelling and will involve sacrifices, but I believe it will offer a sense of satisfaction like no other job. My intrinsic scientific curiosity along with my desire for social interaction drive a commitment to medicine as a life-long endeavour.
- THE GOOD
Conclusion
This conclusion is short and sums up my reasons to study medicine nicely, which is exactly what a good conclusion should do. However, it also describes how I appreciate the challenges that come with it, which show a level of self-awareness and realism that I perhaps missed in my introduction. It follows from the paragraph about my work/life balance which demonstrates appreciation of the sacrifices made in medicine, while demonstrating that these are sacrifices I would happily make for a chance to study, and eventually work, in medicine.
- THE BAD
Conclusion
I think that ‘social interaction’ could have been replaced by something more specific to medicine such as saving lives or advancing medicinal technology, as social interaction could encompass quite a lot of professions. Overall though, I feel this is a very solid conclusion!
Final Thoughts
- THE GOOD
Overall
I have covered practically everything that is expected of a good personal statement in some form here. Despite a couple of structural issues, I believe I have prioritised the the most important and most effective parts of my experience in order to create a statement that paints me in a very good light. From almost all of my work experiences, I have tried to improve certain skills and I showed that I took action to do so. The introduction is as clear as I could make it which is important to convey my key reasons to study medicine while the conclusion sums everything up nicely without repeating too much from the rest of the statement.
- THE BAD
Overall
There are various smaller issues scattered around this personal statement, but nothing that makes it become a weak piece of work. For one, some of the statements I made were unnecessary and vague. Rather than aiming for quantity of experiences/skills, I think that delving into the most important ones with good reflection and understanding of their relevance would have been better. I could have also removed the section about LAMDA exams and piano exams as they would have been described in my UCAS application anyway, and don’t link to medicine in any meaningful way in my writing.
As I said before, I didn’t start the discussion of my experiences with the most impressive and important part, my work experience, which undervalues all the work I did during the time somewhat. My final paragraph about my extra-curricular activities was also a bit weak looking back at it, as the admissions team will only be so impressed by these achievements if I haven’t explained how they have improved my abilities in medicine.
So there you have it! This personal statement helped Lucy get 3/4 offers in her application, which is an incredibly desirable position for any applicant to be in!
Everyone has different experiences and abilities, so you may not be able to relate to everything that was said in this personal statement. However, the information and advice provided by Lucy is universal and will help any applicant write a better personal statement!
Be sure to check out more Medicine Personal Statement Analyses to see advice from all different kinds of applicants, including Ali Abdaal himself, who also attended Cambridge! Or if you want to get started on your own statement, check out 6med’s Personal Statement Bundle for all the support and resources you’ll ever need! If you want full support on every part of your application and a guaranteed place at med school, the Complete Bundle will be perfect for you.
More Medicine Personal Statement Examples & Inspiration
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