Welcome to our collection of Medicine Personal Statement Examples! We’ve searched far and wide to find personal statements from successful applicants all around the UK and asked them to analyse the strengths and weaknesses of their work for your own inspiration. Today’s subject is from Azzra, who studies Medicine at King’s College London.
Azzrah submitted this personal statement during the 2020 admissions cycle and gained all four offers from some the UK’s best medical schools, including Manchester and Birmingham. In the end, he chose King’s College London.
University | King’s College London | University of Manchester | University of Leicester | University of Birmingham |
---|---|---|---|---|
Offer? | Yes | Yes | Yes | Yes |
Let’s read the personal statement that got him a place at KCL, or skip straight to his feedback to learn what made his personal statement a success!
Please be aware that these examples are meant purely for the sake of inspiration, and should absolutely NOT be used as a model around which to base your own personal statement. UCAS have a rather strict system that detects plagiarism.
King's College London Medicine Personal Statement Example
WHOLE PERSONAL STATEMENT
Stepping into the bustling catheter lab confirmed my careful consideration to pursue a career in medicine. A patient had an allergic reaction to the dye inserted, a situation which may seem frantic and alarming to an outsider, but the opposite to the doctors involved due to the communication and teamwork skills that they had. I was inspired by the nature of the team, calm and collected when managing the risk and dealing effectively with the unforeseen circumstance. This experience drew me to a career in medicine, as I saw first hand, the stimulating and problem solving nature is used constructively to treat a patient, using discussion and cooperation skills throughout each challenge.
In order to gauge a realistic idea of life in medicine, I completed work experience and volunteering in both primary and secondary care settings. In paediatrics, I observed a team of doctors analyse the care for each patient, exercising their teamwork skills. They adapted their persona when talking to younger patients and reassured the parents, demonstrating the importance of holistic care of patients, by establishing a good doctor-patient relationship. To ensure I worked on these important qualities, I participated in a student led volunteering trip to Uganda, which allowed myself to be put into an unfamiliar situation and work with peers to teach primary school children enabling me to make connections with the students despite a verbal barrier. This was similar to a challenge I had overcome during volunteering at a neurodisability home, which initially was intimidating due to the nature of the residents’ conditions. However, through bonding using nonverbal communication in activities like cooking, I was able to maintain a lasting relationship with the residents. At a cardiac clinic, I recognised the realities of medicine when the distress of a patient brought him to tears during the consult. The sadness of the patient highlighted to me the need to be compassionate in difficult situations, which I worked on during volunteering, knowing that even a short chat to a patient can make a difference to their day.
At a GP surgery, I had extensive exposure to the importance of communication as I observed the GPs take histories of patients, where I learnt that listening to details of a story is vital as well as ensuring that clear instructions are given. I worked on my communication skills in my role as a House Official, where I interact and work with younger peers listening to their needs and boosting team morale. I enjoy this role as it enables me to hone my public speaking and leadership qualities, essential to a career as a medical professional.
A case of an aortic dissection I saw sparked my interest, leading me to conduct extensive research and present at my school’s MedSoc, which required me to explore outside my curriculum, furthering my analytical skills to provide information at an understandable level to 6th form students. My curiosity in science is shown through participating in the Biology Olympiad and further in medicine by attending masterclasses at the University of Cambridge.
My extracurricular activities include playing flute at grade 5 level, which improves my organisation and manual dexterity, as well as going to the gym regularly, maintaining a healthy work life balance. I also have an interest in politics, leading me to read articles from the Journal of Health Politics, Policy and Law. In Uganda, I realised the global need for improving healthcare resources in less developed areas further cementing my passion, knowing I could use my scientific knowledge and skills in any environment.
I believe I encompass the skills needed to be a compassionate doctor as I have a realistic perception of the challenges this career brings alongside the rewards. Working as a doctor will be constantly stimulating and ever changing which is an exciting prospect I wish to pursue, while making a difference to the lives around me.
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King's College London Medicine Personal Statement Example Analysis
Now, let’s go section by section and see what Azzra has to say about what he wrote:
INTRODUCTION
Stepping into the bustling catheter lab confirmed my careful consideration to pursue a career in medicine. A patient had an allergic reaction to the dye inserted, a situation which may seem frantic and alarming to an outsider, but the opposite to the doctors involved due to the communication and teamwork skills that they had. I was inspired by the nature of the team, calm and collected when managing the risk and dealing effectively with the unforeseen circumstance. This experience drew me to a career in medicine, as I saw first hand, the stimulating and problem solving nature is used constructively to treat a patient, using discussion and cooperation skills throughout each challenge.
- THE GOOD
Introduction
My introduction is captivating at the start and introduces a story of how I initially got interested in having a career in medicine. That’s something that people sometimes forget when writing a personal statement; it needs to be informative and convincing, but it also should be interesting to read. When there’s nothing memorable or nothing to take from your piece of writing, the reader will have a hard time remembering it, thus reducing your chances of success. It doesn’t need to be the most interesting scenario (most applicants won’t have seen anything very exciting in their work experience) but the way you write about it and the discussion of how it affected you personally will be what draws the reader in.
But this is still a personal statement, so you need to demonstrate why you’re a good candidate. In this paragraph, I have already included some of my evidence of work experience and the recognition of the skill set needed to be a doctor. The two common themes throughout everything you write should be what you’ve learnt and how your experience links to the medical profession.
- THE BAD
Introduction
Generally, I am very happy with this paragraph. To improve it though, if the word limit wasn’t as much of a factor, I would take more of journey into why I even got the work experience in the first place, and why medicine was appealing to me. I would include my interest in science here too, as I have only really talked about the human side of being a doctor. However, while context is important, it’s also fair to skip to the most important parts where necessary. Many of these thing, such as my interest in science are implied both here and later in what I have written.
MAIN BODY
Paragraph 1
In order to gauge a realistic idea of life in medicine, I completed work experience and volunteering in both primary and secondary care settings. In paediatrics, I observed a team of doctors analyse the care for each patient, exercising their teamwork skills. They adapted their persona when talking to younger patients and reassured the parents, demonstrating the importance of holistic care of patients, by establishing a good doctor-patient relationship. To ensure I worked on these important qualities, I participated in a student led volunteering trip to Uganda, which allowed myself to be put into an unfamiliar situation and work with peers to teach primary school children enabling me to make connections with the students despite a verbal barrier. This was similar to a challenge I had overcome during volunteering at a neurodisability home, which initially was intimidating due to the nature of the residents’ conditions. However, through bonding using nonverbal communication in activities like cooking, I was able to maintain a lasting relationship with the residents. At a cardiac clinic, I recognised the realities of medicine when the distress of a patient brought him to tears during the consult. The sadness of the patient highlighted to me the need to be compassionate in difficult situations, which I worked on during volunteering, knowing that even a short chat to a patient can make a difference to their day.
- THE GOOD
Paragraph 1
This is my longest and probably most important paragraph I terms of displaying my experience and skills. How you write about your work experience vital to a good personal statement as this is where you will have done a lot of your learning to shape the applicant you are today. Here, I have talked about the realistic side of medicine, showing that I recognise the difficulties of being a doctor, backed up with evidence from my work experience. I also talked about communication and how I have portrayed this in my own activities. All of this is exactly what an admissions team want to see; applicable skills and level of self-awareness when it come to your future in medicine. As I said before, everything here needs to link to what you learnt and how it relates to medicine.
- THE BAD
Paragraph 1
There were more things I could have included given the space, such as more examples of where I have displayed effective communication to ensure my point gets across. I could have also explained my Uganda volunteering in more detail, although the most important parts of this were discussed well. This may have also benefited from being split into two paragraphs to increase the ease of reading, but that’s more of a minor issue.
MAIN BODY
Paragraph 2
At a GP surgery, I had extensive exposure to the importance of communication as I observed the GPs take histories of patients, where I learnt that listening to details of a story is vital as well as ensuring that clear instructions are given. I worked on my communication skills in my role as a House Official, where I interact and work with younger peers listening to their needs and boosting team morale. I enjoy this role as it enables me to hone my public speaking and leadership qualities, essential to a career as a medical professional.
- THE GOOD
Paragraph 2
Here, I recognised the realities of medicine more explicitly and talked about the sadness that doctors and patients alike face. I briefly touched upon the empathy needed to be a doctor and how I portrayed this in my volunteering. This is all important to understand during your time at medical school, so displaying this knowledge early on demonstrates the potential you have to develop as a medical worker.
- THE BAD
Paragraph 2
To improve the paragraph, I would include more detail on empathy and why it is important in medicine. I would include the empathy I have shown towards residents in my volunteering and also during my work experience to ensure that it is not brushed over. I could also have given a brief mentions to some of the actual tasks I had taken part in, but this isn’t as valuable as the skills I had learnt overall.
MAIN BODY
Paragraph 3
A case of an aortic dissection I saw sparked my interest, leading me to conduct extensive research and present at my school’s MedSoc, which required me to explore outside my curriculum, furthering my analytical skills to provide information at an understandable level to 6th form students. My curiosity in science is shown through participating in the Biology Olympiad and further in medicine by attending masterclasses at the University of Cambridge.
- THE GOOD
Paragraph 3
Research and wider reading is the next most valuable experience to discuss after work experience, so it’s always good to dedicate some space to how you have pursued your biggest interest in the field. The more initiative on display, the better. While you don’t need to go into extreme detail about the topic, just mentioning the interest you have in it will be enough to spark a conversation in your interview. If it’s a topic you’re genuinely interested in, this will work in your favour and will allow you to show off your knowledge and communication skills to the interviewers.
- THE BAD
Paragraph 3
The content here is perhaps a bit vague though, so I could have included the research methods I used to conduct the presentation at my school’s med Soc as well as the awards I achieved from the biology Olympiad. I should also have included what the masterclasses were about, as the word limit isn’t really an excuse for omitting this. When it come to experience like this, it’s always good to be more specific.
MAIN BODY
Paragraph 4
My extracurricular activities include playing flute at grade 5 level, which improves my organisation and manual dexterity, as well as going to the gym regularly, maintaining a healthy work life balance. I also have an interest in politics, leading me to read articles from the Journal of Health Politics, Policy and Law. In Uganda, I realised the global need for improving healthcare resources in less developed areas further cementing my passion, knowing I could use my scientific knowledge and skills in any environment.
- THE GOOD
Paragraph 4
It’s always important to discuss your life outside of medicine in your personal statement, no matter how briefly. The admissions team aren’t just looking for someone who is entirely focussed on work and nothing else as this isn’t a particularly healthy way to work! I haven’t gone into too much detail for some of these activities as they don’t really justify the use of words when you are so limited. That being said, it’s always good to highlight the skills you develop from them.
- THE BAD
Paragraph 4
The being said, this paragraph does feel like a bit like a box-checking exercise looking back at it. I don’t relate my first two points to medicine in anyway and instead provide very general (or generic) skills. My discussion of politics is much more in-depth which is certainly a good thing, but overall this is the weakest of the sections in my personal statement.
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CONCLUSION
I believe I encompass the skills needed to be a compassionate doctor as I have a realistic perception of the challenges this career brings alongside the rewards. Working as a doctor will be constantly stimulating and ever changing which is an exciting prospect I wish to pursue, while making a difference to the lives around me.
- THE GOOD
Conclusion
My conclusion is short but it gets my point of why I want to do medicine quite clearly. I have reiterated the important points of my personal statement by mentioning my communication skills and the exciting nature of the career, which makes the conclusion feel like a proper summary of my statement. The aim of the conclusion is link everything back to the main purpose of the statement, showing why you are a good candidate for this university course.
- THE BAD
Conclusion
There are always minor tweaks that could be made in hindsight though. For example, I have touched on the ‘rewards’ of medicine but have not really talked about job satisfaction throughout the personal statement so I would maybe take this out so that there is continuation throughout the statement. The conclusion isn’t the place to bring up new discussion points, so you should make sure everything stated in the paragraph explicitly links back to something discussed previously.
Final Thoughts
- THE GOOD
Overall
The strongest part of my personal statement is my ability to portray the skills needed to be a doctor and where I have displayed these skills in my school and activities. I have provided evidence that I am suited for the role through the discussion of my previous experiences and by explaining exactly what I had learnt from them. The university want to see that you understand the journey you have take and know where you have developed and, in some cases, where you could develop further. I have also explained in detail my role in my different activities and about my deepest interests in the field. This was deliberately so I could shift discussion in the interview to something I felt more comfortable talking about. Your personal statement will always be discussed at some point in your interview, no matter what kind you have, so make sure you are ready to discuss everything you have written further.
- THE BAD
Overall
The biggest weakness in my personal statement is perhaps my academic paragraph, when I could have been more explicit and clear about the academic things I have done to prove that I would be a good medical student and doctor. This could include more reading around the subject. As well as this, my discussion of extra-curricular activities was very surface level, with very few links to the medical profession. It can be easy for the quality of your writing to drop a bit in the latter half of the statement, after you’ve discussed all the most exciting topics. Achieving a consistent quality can be tough, but by remembering the two more important rules of personal statement writing, it is more than possible to create quality writing about even the most uninteresting aspects of your experience. Remember, everything should link to what you’ve learnt and how it links to medicine!
So there you have it! This personal statement helped Azzra earn 4 offers and get a place at Kings College London! Everyone has different experiences and abilities, so you may not be able to relate to everything that was said in this personal statement. However, the information and advice provided by Azzra is universal and will help any applicant write a better personal statement!
Be sure to check out more Medicine Personal Statement Analyses to see advice from all different kinds of applicants, including Ali Abdaal himself! Or if you want to get started on your own statement, check out 6med’s Medicine Mastery Bundle for all the support and resources you’ll ever need, covering the entire application process.
More Medicine Personal Statement Examples & Inspiration
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